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The Colbert Report : Season 3
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Air date: 08 Jan '07 - 138 episodesThe Colbert Report is an American satirical late night television program that airs Monday through Thursday on Comedy Central. It stars political humorist Stephen Colbert, a former correspondent for The Daily Show with Jon Stewart. The Colbert Report is a spin-off from and counterpart to The Daily Show that comments on politics and the media in a similar way. It satirizes conservative personality-driven political pundit programs, particularly Fox News' The O'Reilly Factor. The show focuses on a fictional anchorman character named Stephen Colbert, played by his real-life namesake. The character, described by Colbert as a "well-intentioned, poorly informed, high-status idiot", is a caricature of televised political pundits. The Colbert Report has been nominated for seven Primetime Emmy Awards each in 2006, 2007, 2008, 2009, 2010, 2011, and 2012, two Television Critics Association Awards Awards, and two Satellite Awards. In 2013, it won two Emmys. It has been presented as non-satirical journalism...
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List of Episodes (138)
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The Colbert Report (2005)
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1. Ethan Nadelmann
08 Jan '07Stephen opens the show disappointed that Saddam Hussein was suddenly hanged over the show's break. He responds to Lake Superior State University's ban of the word 'truthiness' in "Who's Attacking Me Now?", and gay.com's naming of Stephen as Person of the Year in "Who's Honoring Me Now?"; gives "Stephen's Sound Advice" for getting over the winter blues.
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The Colbert Report (2005)
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2. Jim Cramer
09 Jan '07Freem replaces superstantial in the opening sequence. Stephen thanks former Archbishop of Warsaw Stanis³aw Wielgus for being caught in a Catholic Church scandal of a non-sexual nature; scorns Democrats for taking a day off Congress for the college football National Championship game, with quick suggestion of taking a day off for a Ontario Junior League Hockey game; begins new segment "We the MEdiator" to pick sides in celebrity feuds, featuring Rosie O'Donnell vs. Donald Trump, Angelina Jolie
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The Colbert Report (2005)
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3. David Kamp
10 Jan '07Stephen criticizes Bush for not sending 300 million troops as Stephen advised the day before but he pardons him if this is "the only mistake he makes in this war". He then talks about illegal immigration in a new segment called "Invasion of the Country Snatchers" and about the new Democratic senator of Missouri and its liberal legislation in the Word-Segment. After the break there is a new episode of Stephen's Tek Jansen adventures.
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The Colbert Report (2005)
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4. Judy Woodruff
11 Jan '07Stephen starts with another episode of his challenge "What Number is Stephen thinking of?" with a clip from 2005. He then celebrates 5 years of Guantanamo Bay and talks to the executive director of Human Rights Watch, Ken Roth. After that he does a "Tip of the Hat/Wag of the finger", double-wagging Apple (claiming this is his first double-wag) for 1) changing their name to "Apple, Inc." and 2) bringing out the iPhone.
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The Colbert Report (2005)
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5. Alex Kuczynski
15 Jan '07Wishing viewers a happy Martin Luther King Day, Stephen calls for a nationwide lie-in to refuse engaging in "anything at all", in the style of passive protest such as Rosa Parks, then attacks Senator Barbara Boxer for comments suggesting Condoleezza Rice has no personal ties to the Iraq War. Stephen praises the army for lowering recruitment expectations in order to be filled; channels last week's guest Jim Cramer for a new financial segment "Stephen's Bears and Balls" focusing on real estate,
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The Colbert Report (2005)
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6. Dinesh D'Souza
16 Jan '07In anticipation of Bill O'Reilly arriving in-studio on Thursday, Stephen lashes out at Jimmy the director for a squeaky chair. In a new segment "Invasion of the Country Snatchers", Stephen profiles immigration issues, from an Italian-descended anti-immigrant possible Presidential nominee, to a chain of pizza restaurants which accept pesos, segueing into Letters from Iwo Jima winning the Best foreign Film Golden Globe. In another "Stephen Colbert's Sport Report", Stephen covers David Beckham
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The Colbert Report (2005)
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7. Richard Clarke
17 Jan '07Still in anticipation of Bill O'Reilly arriving in-studio on Thursday Stephen is more nervous than the day before, bringing out some cherished objects he plans to show O'Reilly the next day. He then talks about the NFL play-offs with Lynn Swann, trying to trash talk all teams except the New Orleans Saints who he favors. After the break "Better know a district" continues with Washington's 3rd congressional district representative, Brian Baird.
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The Colbert Report (2005)
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8. Bill O'Reilly
18 Jan '07The big day is here, so Stephen is crazy with anticipation that Bill O'Reilly will be on the show, stating that his only goal with this show was to see this day, which makes him reveal a "Mission Accomplished" banner and open the last door on his "Bill O'Reilly advent calendar" (in which he finds Geraldo's mustache). He then turns back to US politics talking about Bush's plans to rise the troop levels in Iraq. He then talks about fights between celebrities on his segment "We the MEdiator",
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The Colbert Report (2005)
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9. Tom Schaller
22 Jan '07Stephen is disappointed at the loss by the New Orleans Saints to the Chicago "God-less killing Machines" Bears. In another "Who's Riding My Coattails Now?", Stephen calls out Bill Clinton for speaking at Knox College after Colbert already had, and artist Terence Koh for selling sperm (in his art) after Stephen's Formula 401 line. The Word is based on the refusal of Alberto Gonzales to admit a right of the people not stated specifically in the Constitution. In another "Stephen Colbert's Balls For
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The Colbert Report (2005)
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10. Michael S. Steele
23 Jan '07Stephen explains that this is the second of two episodes they taped on January 22, so that he can host a State of the Union address party on the 23rd. Russ Lieber appears in-studio to comment on new laws of the Democrat-controlled Congress. A new Threatdown is "Media Watchdog" themed.
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The Colbert Report (2005)
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11. Lou Dobbs
24 Jan '07Lou Dobbs, author of War on the Middle Class, faces the truth hammer when he sits down to talk with Stephen.
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The Colbert Report (2005)
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12. Mike Wallace
25 Jan '07Bill O'Reilly spills the beans on Stephen, and says what he really thought of him on his show. Stephen interviews Coach Bob Mancini of the Saginaw Spirit. And he doesn't like how he stands on the SMU dispute over Bush's library.
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The Colbert Report (2005)
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13. Barry Lando
29 Jan '07Colbert wins bet with mayor of Oshawa after Saginaw Spirit defeated Oshawa Generals. Colbert discusses Microsoft paying someone for Wikipedia edits, and concludes that reality has become a commodity. Wag of the finger to Scientology, which named Tom Cruise as the "Christ" of the cult.
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The Colbert Report (2005)
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14. Donna Shalala
30 Jan '07Stephen opens the show by showing a clip from Fox News' Fox and Friends, talking about the invisible beam that makes a person think he is on fire. Stephen then talks about how he stole his neighbor's New York Times and argues with David Leonhardt about what one could do with $1.2 trillion. This is followed by a new segment, "Judge, Jury, and Executioner" and ends by revealing the new microwave (fitted with a Colbert Report logo) which he would be sending to Bill O'Reilly after stealing his
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The Colbert Report (2005)
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15. Jed Babbin
31 Jan '07Stephen opens the show by discussing the "problem" with Global Warming and in protest replaces Bobby with a 5000 Watt heat lamp. This is followed by the return of the "On Notice" board and the introduction of the "Fantasies" board. Jane Fonda (his fantasy) and The Weather Channel are placed on notice and Lutherans and E Street Band are taken off. This is followed by the 39th installment of Better Know a District, with New York's 6th congressional district representative,Gregory Meeks.
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The Colbert Report (2005)
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16. Chuck Schumer
01 Feb '07Stephen comments on the 2007 Boston Mooninite Scare that occurred in Boston and laments the fact that he can no longer proceed with his obviously threatening-looking advertisements. This is followed by the "Movies Destroying America" segment, commenting on Steve Carrell's nomination and Ellen DeGeneres hosting. The show is ended by Stephen presenting "The Most Poetic F#@king Thing I've Ever Heard"
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The Colbert Report (2005)
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17. Wendy Kopp
05 Feb '07Stephen is ecstatic at the slaughtering the Bears underwent in Super Bowl XLI. Also, he introduces a new product "Formula 419" (A combination of his Formula 401 and 18, Peyton Manning's Jersey number). Then, Stephen notes that Stephen Jr. has returned from Canada and back into Washington (unfortunately in Washington's 3rd, where Better Known representative Brian Baird has lobbied for a new hunting law).
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The Colbert Report (2005)
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18. Charlie LeDuff
06 Feb '07Stephen receives a message from Master Media International that they would be praying on his behalf on February 22. This is followed by the 40th installment of Better Know A District (Ohio's 18th with congressman Zack Space).
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The Colbert Report (2005)
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19. Steven Pinker
07 Feb '07Stephen starts by introducing a new segment, "California Values Watch". After addressing San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsom's recent problems. Then talks about the controversy stirred between Representatives Loretta Sanchez and Joe Baca. This is followed by the series finale of Tek Jansen.
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The Colbert Report (2005)
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20. Debra Dickerson
08 Feb '07Stephen starts by talking about the astronaut incident on the news and especially that everyone talks about Lisa Nowak wearing a diaper, admitting that he too wears a diaper during his workday. He then claims that Henry Kissinger called him to get him to run for president, which he says he will "not" do (or will he?) but he has formed an exploratory committee on whether to form an exploratory committee.
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The Colbert Report (2005)
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21. Michael Oppenheimer
12 Feb '07Stephen starts by dancing/singing "My Humps" behind his desk and discusses Grammys. He then talks about criticism of the Iraq War transitioning into "The Word." This is followed by a "Tip of the Hat - Wag of the Finger" segment, in which he commends Australian Prime Minister John Howard for his attack on Barack Obama, but also chastises him for attacking an American citizen.
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The Colbert Report (2005)
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22. Sheryl WuDunn
13 Feb '07Colbert talks about the Chinese Menace, entitling a Colbert Report special report "Apocalypse Mao: Murdered By The Orient's Success".
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The Colbert Report (2005)
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23. Lance Armstrong
14 Feb '07Stephen makes correction, that the Chinese have four times more population than the US, not three. Colbert admonishes people teaching seniors about sex. Sport Report: about the Westminster Dog Show, the Sports Illustrated swimsuit edition, and mentions that the Saginaw Spirit had reached the playoffs.
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The Colbert Report (2005)
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24. Shashi Tharoor
15 Feb '07Colbert talks about how Mastermedia International will pray for him on February 22nd. Asks J. J. Abrams how his prayer day went, with photo of Jimmie "J.J." Walker showing. Then he moves on, to talking about Helen Thomas losing her front row seat at the White House press room. Interviews Candice Bergen by phone about her prayer day too. Better Know A District guest was Vic Snyder from Arkansas's 2nd congressional district.
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The Colbert Report (2005)
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25. Zev Chafets
26 Feb '07Stephen compares Britain leaving Iraq to Britain leaving the U.S. and India - saying it will cause a flourish of Democracy.
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