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You Can't Do That on Television : Season 5
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You Can't Do That on Television is a Canadian television program that first aired locally in 1979 before airing internationally in 1981. It featured pre-teen and teenaged actors in a sketch comedy format. Each episode had a theme. The show was notable for launching the careers of many performers, including Alanis Morissette, and writer Bill Prady, who would write and produce shows like The Big Bang Theory, Gilmore Girls and Dharma and Greg. The show was produced by and aired on Ottawa's CTV station CJOH-TV. After production ended in 1990, the show continued in reruns on Nickelodeon through 1994, when it was replaced with the similar All That. The show is synonymous with Nick, and was at that time extremely popular, with the highest ratings overall on the channel. The show is also well known for introducing the network's iconic slime. The program is the subject of the 2004 feature-length documentary, You Can't Do That on Film, directed by David Dillehunt.
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List of Episodes (26)
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You Can't Do That on Television (1979)
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1. Friends
Laverne and Shirley Kill Each Other will not be seen at this time so that we may present... Christine is broke and the other cast members won't talk to her until she pays up what she owes them. In order to do the show, she pays them each a dollar to do their lines with her.
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You Can't Do That on Television (1979)
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2. ESP - Magic Astrology
The Twilight Zone Gets Redeveloped will not be seen at this time so that we may present... The crew fears a ghost is haunting the studio when strange things start happening. Lisa decides to perform an exorcism to get rid of it. In the sketches, the cast pokes fun at ESP and astrology, as well as magic in sketches like Genie of the Electric Lamp.
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You Can't Do That on Television (1979)
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3. Hobbies
Hobby Days will not be seen at this time so that we may present... Christine talks about fashion, her latest hobby.
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You Can't Do That on Television (1979)
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4. History
The Six Wives of Henry VIII will not be seen at this time so that we may present... The cast parodies historical events, as Alasdair traces his family history and Christine writes a research essay.
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You Can't Do That on Television (1979)
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5. Courage
11 Jun '84The Smurfs Meet Godzilla will not be seen at this time so that we may present... The cast must be brave to overcome stage fright as the show's ratings are higher then ever.
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You Can't Do That on Television (1979)
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6. Body Parts
Real People's Armpits will not be seen at this time so that we may present... The show's cast competes to see who has the perfect body.
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You Can't Do That on Television (1979)
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7. Marketing
Miss Piggy Sold to a Sausage Factory will not be seen at this time so that we may present... To raise money to keep the show on the air, the cast tries to sell water and green slime to viewers.
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You Can't Do That on Television (1979)
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8. Foreign Countries
Around the World in 80 Days will not be seen at this time so that we may present… Ross appears interested in world travel and foreign cultures, like the rest of the cast. Actually, Ross is only interested in playing ""exchange bank.""
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You Can't Do That on Television (1979)
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9. Literature
Masterpiece Theater will not be seen at this time so that we may present... Christine tries to become one of the shows writers, while Justin tries to track down the great author A. Nonymous. In the sketches, the cast looks at the classics of literature.
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You Can't Do That on Television (1979)
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10. Moving
Mr. Rogers Gets Evicted will not be seen at this time so that we may present... Christine's family moves into a new house in the hills.
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You Can't Do That on Television (1979)
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11. Technology
The Electric Company Blows a Fuse will not be seen at this time so that we may present... The cast takes another look at computers and robots. In the process, Ross tests out an interactive poll system. Viewers are supposed to touch the superimposed green and red squares on the screens to determine what happens next. The result: in the space of four minutes, Luke gets shot, Vanessa is slimed, and Lisa is forced to not say anything.
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You Can't Do That on Television (1979)
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12. Ambition
Dallas & Dynasty will not be seen at this time so that we may present... The cast explains their ambitions in life. Christine spends a lot of time explaining how she wants to be an actress.
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You Can't Do That on Television (1979)
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13. Clubs
The Mickey Mouse Club will not be seen at this time so that we may present... Christine joins a health club, but isn't really interested in the club's healthy atmosphere.
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You Can't Do That on Television (1979)
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14. Holidays
01 Jan '85The A-Team Wreck Disneyland will not be seen at this time so that we may present... The cast tries to convince Ross to give them a holiday.
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You Can't Do That on Television (1979)
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15. Colleges
The college football game scheduled at this time between MIT and UCLA will not be seen because ""mitucla"" is a dirty word in Arundi Barundi. Alasdair tries to get a video game scholarship to get into college.
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You Can't Do That on Television (1979)
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16. Halloween
Boy George Without Makeup will not be seen at this time so that we may present... Christine puts a spell on Ross that causes evil ghosts to haunt him.
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You Can't Do That on Television (1979)
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17. Christmas
Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer Joins the A-Team will not be seen at this time so that we may present... Alasdair purchases a ton of mistletoe to try to get a kiss from one of the girls.
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You Can't Do That on Television (1979)
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18. Politics
To Tell the Truth (with guest host Richard Nixon) will not be seen at this time so that we may present... Lisa is nominated by Christine to run for class president.
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You Can't Do That on Television (1979)
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19. War
The Love Boat Goes on a Cruise Missile Cruise will not be seen at this time so that we may present... Alasdair forms an anti-war group (W.I.M.P.), while Ross argues that war is a necessary evil.
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You Can't Do That on Television (1979)
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20. Science
Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Wizard will not be seen at this time so that we may present... Alasdair tries to discover the formula for the green slime.
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You Can't Do That on Television (1979)
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21. Divorce
Family Ties Get Untied will not be seen at this time so that we may present... The show's producer is getting divorced, and his wife takes half of the show's stuff.
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You Can't Do That on Television (1979)
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22. Families
The Partridge Family Get Shot will not be seen at this time so that we may present... Ross' nephew visits the show, but doesn't get along very well with the cast.
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You Can't Do That on Television (1979)
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23. Malls / Hangouts
The A-Team Makes One Cup of Coffee Last 5 Hours will not be seen at this time so that we may present... Alasdair becomes a street musician, while Ross acts as his manager. The rest of the cast spends the entire show sitting around doing nothing.
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You Can't Do That on Television (1979)
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24. Seasons / Weather
Mr. Wizard Shows You How to Make Rain will not be seen at this time so that we may present... Alasdair makes a weather machine, but it doesn't work correctly.
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You Can't Do That on Television (1979)
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25. Jealousy
Knight Rider Wants a Ferrari will not be seen at this time so that we may present... The cast is jealous of Christine after she gets a raise.
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